In following the tradition of trying one conceptual piece per semester, the handcuffs are about intimacy, vulnerability, and control.

Intimacy asks us to be vulnerable. Wearing the cuffs is symbolic of someone you love having control over that vulnerability.

This isn’t a bad thing, by being vulnerable we allow others greater power to help us: it’s why people ‘surrender’ to god hoping his control will set them on a better path. Maybe your partner gives you confidence.

But vulnerability also gives people greater permission to hurt us: Cults that control members with their love. Woman who stay with abusive men. Abusers who both love and hurt family.

Relationships are two way of course, we play both the ‘controller’ and the ‘vulnerable”